The will of God never takes you to where the grace

of God will not protect you.

Do what you think is right for those you love and then TRUST God.

Sometimes RIGHT is hard

When you think you have answers!

***************************

There comes a point in your life when you realize:Who matters,

Who never did,
Who won't anymore,
And who always will.

So, don't worry about people from your past,
there's a reason why they didn't make it to your future.

Time Will...Pray Will...?

I have had so many questions lately, but even more questions in the past few days!! Sometimes I spend so much time trying to determine what I did wrong in the past to deserve the unpleasant happenings of the moment. I know if I lock my self in a prison of failure and self-pity, I also know I am the only jailer…who holds the only key to my freedom. I know I can let my self out of prison by turning to the Lord for strength. But why is this so hard!!! I know with HIS help I can use my trials as stepping stones. The keys are in my hands. I, the Lord, am bound when ye do what I say; but when ye do not what I say, ye have no promise. If I am offended and resentful, can I believe that HE is bound to help me in my disappointments and challenges? My challenge is to endure, it is not easy sometimes!! There will always be tests and trials along life’s paths. MUCH Heartache!! No one gets trough this life without! But we are told... God’s promises make things worth it. Sometimes I am just not sure! I guess a good attitude for me to have would be to remember the love HE has for me and my family and try to feel the strength from HIM...BUT when my eyes are blurred with tears of sorrow.... my vision is limited. I truly feel that we all are entitled to question. “What did I do wrong? Does HE not see how hard I am trying? How come I did not know? Why are people so mean? Why do people want to destroy someone? Who could even think that way? Why do they think they are in charge my salvation? Why do people say they will do something and then just don't? Why do people have such serious health problems? Why can't people wake up in the morning and ask them self what they could do for someone else? Why do I have to feel this way? Is this fair? How can someone be so judgmental and say they are entitled to righteous judgement? Who truly knows what righteous judgment is and who are we to say if it is or isn't? Why are there truly evil people in this world? How can people be so self serving and non caring? Why do people say things that can be so irreversible? Why does someone stay imprisoned and be a victim? Why do we continue to carry burdens and baggage? Why do people want to blame others for EVERYTHING!!! Where have I failed? Why can't people TRULY forgive? Why are the answers to my prayers and pleas withheld? WHY, WHY, WHY!!!! I can say I am guilty to all of the questions at times, and I am sure others have asked the same questions with me in mind!! As I have been reading and searching for answers, praying for peace, that I am yet to find.... these thoughts have helped some what!

I do want to be a Disciple of God, this I know for sure! I want to embrace each day with joy. So when I am faced with physical sickness and despair...I know I need to try to steer my self away from this! This is hard for me to do for some reason, not always but for sure lately. I know I need to direct my thought on the love and gratitude I have for my Heavenly Father, and the love has for me. In this life we have to have challenges, I know they can either bring me closer to HIM and make me stronger or I can use them to destroy me! It is only MY decision to choose the road I want to take! I know I am a child of God, I know if I neglect to feed my self spiritually, I will be completely distracted and this world and people in it, will destroy me!! It is so hard for me to ask for guidance when it is most needed! I do not always hear it! I know I can not communicate with God unless... I can give up the "natural man" and come to the lowest levels of meekness!! I have to be completely surrendered to HIM.... to feel HIS light. This too is very hard for me! I know I need to put all of my hurt and pain into an eternal perspective for the hope and light to return to my soul. I feel so selfish when I stop and ponder and think about what Jesus Christ has done for me! God knows I am so far from perfection as we ALL suffer with imperfections. But again I try and remember that HE will give me strength and suggestions of where I need to improve! I can only do this for my self and no one else. I know God knows better what I need than I do. I have to try and just do my best to listen and I know things will fall into place. We are in charge of our own feelings and our own salvation no one else's!!! I need to not fear nor should anyone else but do know there are consequences for EVERYONE! For those who wronged you and those who truly do not forgive!!!! Saying you forgive is different than showing it!!!! I think you can truly forgive if you can look into someones eyes long enough to see the child of God in that person!! When you honestly do not judge...You will finally be free, and will have forgiven!!! In the case of my own family and extended family the one thing I wish we ALL could become is...OUR OWN JUDGE and NO ONE ELSE'S!!! I know at times we all have been hurt so badly that we feel as though we have been choked...BUT I do know I have to forgive and I will! I also know that many will have to forgive me too! It takes some time in certain situations!! I know I have to avoid and or get rid of the negative critical thought I carry because they are only hurting me! Again this is hard. I know on my road to salvation it is normal to have questions arise but.... what I do not want is.... DOUBT and to loose faith. I know with Heavenly Father and with me trying to put one foot in front of the other I will find clarity, forgiveness and hope. I will continue to pray that doubt and the love for anyone... will not come into the equation. I will continue to pray not to react or feel hate....I will continue to seek the LIGHT. I know there is light in everyone somewhere!! I know sometimes I just need to stay in quiet peaceful place by my self for a time. I know if I can just stand still and hold on to my peace the Lord will fight for me!! There are many that say they want to be good and do good and that is commendable but...their actions say different. I guess the only way to achieve this is to live a life that is COMPLETELY influenced by the Holy Ghost. Again I will pray for this and try to do this. I know then, HE will then be able to tech me what to do and say! We ALL need to be grateful to serve but we all need to realize when we serve someone else that we are truly the ones who is receiving the service! This is the only time we should serve our selves is when we are truly serving someone else. I try and remember when someone says something hurtful or with hold something that is dear from me....or someone wants to judge me or a loved one....I will continue to try and remember these are just life lessons to be learned! When anyone might think me or my family needs to be refined in some way and want to judge or feel like it is their place to take charge...Instead of letting God be in charge, and letting us be judge by HIM....I feel like one day they will come to know that....They to are not perfect....and in time their families will have some struggles along the way. But...One thing I want them to know is...I will pray for peace for them and not ridicule them or their religion or render so called righteous judgement.

The reality is every thought, every feeling, every action contributes to who we are and what we are becoming! There is forgiveness FOR ALL!! It is up to us and only us how we want to meet HIM, when HE returns or when we return. I look forward to the day HE will come and we all can glory in HIS presence if we choose to!!! It is our choice...NO ONE ELSE'S!!!

Love, Mom...Sister....Auntie....Friend

“MY SON, PEACE BE UNTO THY SOUL; THINE ADVERSITY AND THINE AFFLICTIONS SHALL BE BUT A SMALL MOMENT; “AND THEN IF THOU ENDURE IT WELL, GOD SHALL EXALT THEE ON HIGH; THOU SHALT TRIUMPH OVER ALL THY FOES.”

LOVEEEEEE!!!!!!

Wooow Tamy Scheeeuuurnnnnnnnnnn

I looooooooooooooveeed thee shirts I loved the letter I loveed the tortillas I lovved the candys!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!100%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

I lovee youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!!!! I ate a bag off toritillas!!I used a shirt yesterday the green one hahahaha

In Brazil everything is ok! My mom is kind of mad... because I dont want to be an engineering anymore I want to be a Pilot! But she think that is not a good job! Im really confused!

Im going to travel, im going to RIO DE JANEIRO!!! hahaha with Tuzara and another Friend his name is Igor

I will take some pictures and I will send to you!

Last week I send an email to Rhett and he told me that he will answer later because he was really buzy

guess what? I did a test to be a english teacher here in braazil... the result comes in agost! Im wating for hahahahaha would be fun

I know Walker Scheurn!!!!!! he forgot about eric kentish! i got figth him when I come back to arizona!

I was looking your blog.. Thom is ok? He got hurt hun?tell me about your knee?

My mom asked me about the rock... could you send me a picture of one?

I LOVE YOU SO MUCH

AND THAAAAAAAAAAAANKSS SOO MUCH!!! FOR EVERYTHIIIIING!!!

WITH A LOTSSSS OF LOVE

ERIC KENTISH the besttttttt

Next Please!!

Tom and I come home from a fun week at the beach to our air conditioning NOT working!! We have three units in our house but of course the one that has gone out is the one on our side of the house with our bedroom!! So that includes Rhett's room as well and the play room!! We were suppose to have a new unit put in about a month and a half ago but the guy that was to fix it did not show up and the anti-freeze he put in it seemed to be holding it pretty well! We have called several times and he keeps telling us he would get to it! NOW he says it will be two and a half weeks before he can come! Well we know that will not work so mean while we have called four or five other companies and they are not much help either!!So that has been since Saturday! My chap stick on my night stand even melted! Then starting Sunday the pump and the electrical all went out on the well that provides water to our house and all the neighbors houses, that we share the well with!! So we have had very little water!! Pug as been using one of his big water trucks to get water out of the fire hydrant and filling the well up so we can have a short shower and the toilets to flush and other than that not much else! Then on Monday...I went to the doctor for a infusion and I thought I was going to die!! The drug that Dr. Swarup used is one I have been on for along time for my Rheumatoid Arthritis and Sjogrens Syndrome! It is Remicade and although I was off of it for a year and a half or so....Due to some unfavorable lab work...I was told that I needed to start back on it!! The regiment starts with it every two weeks for six weeks and then it goes to every 3 weeks and then to four weeks ect...! So I had my first treatment the week before California. Other than the standard fatigue and nausea and muscle and joint pain for a few days I seemed to do well with the first round!! So this Monday my appointment was scheduled for ten and I was to be done around twelve thirty! My port was accessed and I was given the pre-medications so you do not have a reaction! The steroids and benadryl and zofran. I have never had any problems before other than some severe hives in the middle of the night only one time quite a long time ago! As I sat and read....about a hour into the infusion,I felt somewhat sick to my stomach which is not unlike me. The nurse monitors you very close as the medication is given while there! Tina had just done vitals on me and all was well when...maybe five minutes passed and I seemed to not feel so good. I kept thinking....Oh this is just anxiety and I just need to relax and take a deep breath or two! I quickly realized I could not get a good breath and I felt like my head was going to blow off!! I put the recliner down and was trying to get up but was so weak and unable to get up... and the two nurses were in their office! I remember thinking...HELP! About that time the lady sitting next to me called for Tina....I knew something was seriously wrong!! Tina and Barbara came in a hurry and called for more help! All I remember was people moving very fast! Drawers and cupboards flying open and many people around me hanging different things on my I.V. pole....taking vitals and hearing them say SHE IS HAVING A REACTION....STOP THE MEDICATION!! They all kept saying you are going to be fine BUT....I was not sure if that was true!! I just kept saying...I CAN'T BREATH!!! I have had a lot of health scares but none that scared me like that!! After about twenty minutes or so I started to come back around! I was breathing much better but all I could think about was that I needed to get into the bathroom because I was just wretching so hard!! They finally got me up to the bathroom and when I saw my self in the mirror I thought I was going to faint! I was SO RED head to toe....Even the whites of my eyes were red!! The nurses kept reassuring me I was going to be fine but...I still was not sure!! I still felt like I was going to explode from the heat I felt in my head! The zofran began to kick in as well and things were somewhat settled by then! BUT let me make this clear I thought I was dying for that thirty minutes or so!! Once I got back to my chair Tina told me they would start the Remicade back in a hour!! WHAT!! Not NO but HELL NO!! She reassured me that they would start much slower and that they would run it over a much longer period of time and they would be ready if I would have another reaction to it! I am not sure who was more scared me or the lady sitting next to me!! She kept telling me "you looked SO BAD"!!! "I was so scared"!! "I knew something was very wrong the first glance I saw of you"!!! She was scared!!! Tina seemed to think since I had never had that happen before that it would be fine and she would go slow! Tina said she had seen this kind of reaction before! Well if I could not breath before I felt sure I could not breath now due to anxiety!! The rest of the infusion went without any problems other than the medications they gave me knocked me out which was good and bad! Good for anxiety but bad because I had to drive my self home! I did not call anyone because I felt like I had worried enough for everyone that would of been involved!! Several hours later when I was done they had me stay longer and drink some seven up and eat some crackers and later on that afternoon I was able to drive home!! Actually I stopped by Posey's and she colored my hair!! Who would of ever know that all happened if I would not of spilt the beans today!! Tina said next time she would have me come very early and pre-medicate me more!! G-WEEZE....I can't wait!!! Yesterday I still felt not so good but.... I do feel like things are looking up though! I think that Tom got a hold of a reliable air conditioning man and the pump for the well should go in on Thursday or Friday!! Posey was sweet and brought me some new special hair products today.... What a treat....Who would not love that!! Tom brought a big fan home that is suppose to cool things down in our room! I also have had a little extra water to get some laundry done...Like the sweaty sheets and then some!! AND I got a email from Rhett!! So things are for sure looking up!! I really do have to look on the bright side of things!! ALL of our air conditioning units could be out and I could have NO water and no special hair treats from Posey and NO EMAIL due to zone conference and NO BREATH due to my infusion!! So all in all I feel much better about everything after blogging my thoughts and realizing things are not that bad!! This is nothing compared to so many!! But I do want this week to be DONE PLEASE!!!!

SIDE NOTE~~ It is now Friday and one of our hot water heaters went out on the opposite side of the house! So no cool air on the west side of house and no hot water on the east side of the house!! Who cares.... we sure do not need hot water in the summer!!

I LOVE MY SISTERS!!!!

Julie, Jami, Kim, me, Stacy, and our baby sister Nena!

What would I do with out my sisters!!!

I feel sure I have the BEST sisters and sister-in-laws ever!! It is such a blessing to now that I can call any of them for ANYTHING!!! It is funny how their kids are mine and my kids are theirs!! Each of us are different in some ways, but in so many other ways we are so alike!!! I feel sure I have been blessed with the very best sisters in the whole world!!! Kim, Stacy, Nena, Julie and Jami....I love you all so much! I know the Lord put us all in the same family for reasons only us know and for many reasons that everyone knows!! I LOVE you all with all of my heart....FOREVER!!!!!!!

Good Byes!!

Gavin and Lucy had such a great time in California! I feel sure the best part of the trip was being spoiled by their Aunt Stacy!! They LOVE her more than words could say!!!! Saying good bye to Aunt Stacy was traumatic to say the least!! My sweet sister Stacy always for years when we leave to go home..... She runs along the side of our car for about a block or so WAVING good bye!!! This morning as we left I was going to take her picture! The first ten miles or so are always so sad as we leave to go home but this time... I look back and I see Gavin or as Aunt Stacy calls him... Gavilies, he was sobbing!!! I could not help but to take these pictures to send to Aunt Stacy!! Then I hear Lucy sobbing as well!! Man.. This was a tuff morning!! It is a good thing Tom held it together as well as he did!! Aunt Stacy WE LOVE YOU!! !!!! Thank you for EVERYTHING!!! You are the best Auntie and Sister EVER!!!!!!

Gavin and Lucy cried them selves to sleep BUT not until outside of Alpine!!!!! :(

Watching Aunt Stacy run along our car!!!

Good Bye Aunt Stacy!!! We ALL love you forever!!!!

Big Hugs!

Tamy!

Location:Kumeyaay Hwy,Ocotillo,United States

A Week At The Beach!!!

Tom and I took a quick week at the beach!! It was a little warm but all in all we had a wonderful time!!! Tom is a beach kind of guy...I perfer the Mountains, But we had such a nice time with my family and grand kids....Yes grand kids!! We took Gavin and Lucy with us and they had a great time!!! The best part of there trip was being spoiled by their Aunt Stacy!!!!

What a CUTE boy!!!!

My oldest sister Kim and my brother-in-law Bubba!! Kim and Nena made a beautiful pasta dinner on Wednesday night and with all of us thee was over 30 people!!! Kim I adore you and Bubba you are my favotrite brother-in-law!!

My nephews Forrest Jack and Grayson and my sister-in-law Jami AKA JANE!! This picture is for Rhett!! Rhett LOVES his cousins!!!

My sister Stacy who we stayed with! She is amazing!! Stacy took care of Tom, Gavin, Lucy and I all week at her house! She made things so nice for us!!! Stacy I LOVE YOU FOREVER!! Madison is my brother Kip and Julie's daughter> We were so happy they come over to the coast to be with us!! Corley is Stacy's daughter and I will say she is the sweetest girl EVER! Corley my sweet girl you are a precious to me!!

"The Girls" Kim, Julie, Stacy, Jami and Jami!! LOVE THEM TOO!

The girls can talk forever!!

Cousins and my nieces!!!! Corley, Valentina, Madison and Grace!!

Stacy's Son Reese!! This kid keeps us on the ball!! I think he is part fish!! Reese never comes out of the water!!

Surfer Boy Gavin! Gavin...Pops and Granny loves you so much!!! Your surfing was AWESOME!!!

Lu-Lu!! Gavin sister was a champ all week!! Lucy is so excited because Aunt Stacy took her to have a feather in her hair!! And did I say AUNT STACY SPOILS these kids!!!!!

New bathing suit from Aunt Stacy!! DID I SAY...AUNT STACY SPOILED Gavin in Lucy ALL week!!!!!

The boogie board queen Lucy!!

Corley and Lucy!!!

Not sue what this van was all about but...I is a Christmas van like you have NEVER seen!!!

The best sisters in the whole world!!!! Sis-in-law Julie, Jami.Kim.me, Stacy and Nena!!!
A Little rest and relaxing time!!! Corely curled Lucy and my hair!!! Notice the beautiful

Nena!!!

Bull, Tom and Jim Babe were able to enjoy a nice round of golf at the Del Mar Country Club!!!!

Of Course they all can have what they want, WE SAID!!!!!!!!! Reese, Valentina, Grace, Natalie, Gavin, Lucy!!!
Lucy, Gavin and Grace Tignini!!!